i barfeds in our rink
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
