So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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