I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Randomize
