real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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