just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
