Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
