I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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