walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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