I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
