OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
your room smells of hookers.
And success
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
