Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
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Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
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