i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize
