We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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