Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I'm jealous of your bromance
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
