we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
