i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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