We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize