Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
He felt like a one man threesome
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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