I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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