fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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