is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
this hospital has no fireball
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
