that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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