they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Randomize
