Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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