well I can't set my house on fire every night
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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