I want you more than these girls want KFC
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
