Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
foreskin is a definite game changer
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize