I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
