I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
