Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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