We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Randomize