I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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