D3 body, D1 cock
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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