Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
