Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
He felt like a one man threesome
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
