what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
