Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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