I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
