But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
