That's when you crack a 10am beer
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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