i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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