told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
