I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
