is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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