i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Randomize
