Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
