no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize