How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize
