Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize