Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
