Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Randomize
